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In a move that has sent shockwaves through the political establishment and elicited a range of reactions from bemusement to sheer panic, the Supreme Court has issued a landmark decision regarding the taxation of interstellar currency. The ruling, which has been hailed as a "quantum leap for fiscal policy" by the astro-economic community, has thrust the United States into a new era of financial management, one that involves space-faring aliens, cryptocurrencies, and the mysterious "Lunar Ledger."

The case at the heart of this legal earthquake involves Congressman Galacticus, a freshman congressman from the State of Nebula, who introduced a bill to regulate the influx of Zephyrium, an alien cryptocurrency mined on the asteroid belt. Galacticus, a self-proclaimed "fiscal guardian of the galaxy," argued that the federal government must assert jurisdiction over Zephyrium to prevent what he called "cosmic financial anarchy."

The Supreme Court, in a decision penned by Chief Justice Spacewalker, ruled that while Zephyrium is indeed a legitimate form of currency, its taxation would require a constitutional amendment. The Court's reasoning was as convoluted as a wormhole, with Justice Spacewalker opining that "the framers of the Constitution could not have possibly imagined a time when the value of a dollar would be eclipsed by the value of an intergalactic token."

The ruling has sparked a frenzy of activity on Capitol Hill, where members of Congress have been seen donning virtual reality headsets to debate the implications of taxing extraterrestrial transactions. Senator Starchild, a staunch advocate for interstellar commerce, has proposed a bill to create a new "Space Revenue Service" (SRS) to handle the complexities of off-world taxation. "We must adapt or be left behind," Starchild declared, while simultaneously tripping over a virtual Martian land rover in the Senate chamber.

Meanwhile, the IRS has announced the appointment of a new commissioner, Agent Astronaut, who will be responsible for "integrating the human element into our cosmic fiscal framework." Agent Astronaut, who has a degree in "Galactic Fiscal Policy" from the University of Outer Space, assured the public that the IRS is fully equipped to manage this new dimension of taxation, despite the fact that the agency's current computer system struggles to process paper returns from Kansas.

As the nation grapples with this new chapter in American fiscal history, one thing is clear: the future of taxation is as uncertain as the trajectory of a comet. Will Congress rise to the occasion and establish a universal tax code for the cosmos? Or will this be another case of fiscal space-jam, where legislation collides with the realities of interstellar commerce? Only time—and possibly a panel of intergalactic tax consultants—will tell.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.