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In a series of events that would make George Orwell roll over in his grave, the Supreme Court has officially opened proceedings in the case of the impeached leader, Ex-President Scrooge McDuck, whose legendary tax evasion scheme has become the talk of the town – or what's left of it.

As the world edges closer to a full-blown dystopian nightmare, with rampant inflation, unemployment rates skyrocketing past the moon, and a war that's been going on for so long that historians are now referring to it as 'the permanent conflict,' the nation's highest court finds time to tackle the pressing issue of whether or not the impeached leader can legally hide his fortune in a vast, offshore swimming pool of gold coins.

Legal experts are divided. On one side, there are those who argue that in these tumultuous times, when the common man is struggling to make ends meet, it's only fair that the rich, especially those who have been impeached for various ethically questionable reasons, should contribute their fair share to society. They argue that the impeached leader's continued evasion of tax responsibilities is a slap in the face to the hardworking Americans who are currently duct-taping their wallets shut just to make it through the month.

On the other side, there are those who believe that the impeached leader's tax avoidance is a masterful display of American ingenuity, a testament to the entrepreneurial spirit that has made this country great. They argue that the impeached leader's actions are not only legal but also a form of economic patriotism, as his wealth remains within the borders of the country, albeit in a giant, gold, coin-filled pool.

As the nation watches with bated breath, the Supreme Court is set to deliver a ruling that could either be a beacon of hope for the little guy or a further nail in the coffin of an already beleaguered populace. In the meantime, the impeached leader has been spotted at a local shopping center, furtively loading his shopping cart with cases of gold bullion – because, let's face it, one can never be too prepared for the apocalypse, especially when you're swimming in an ocean of gold.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.