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In a staggering turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the hallowed halls of Congress, sources close to the embattled President Pro Tempore, Senator Thaddeus J. "Thunder Thumbs" O'Bannon, have revealed that his potential impeachment could inadvertently lead to a seismic shift in American taxation policy. The implications of this revelation are so profound that political pundits are already heralding it as the "Grand Upheaval of 2023."

The drama unfolded earlier this week when a leaked memo from the Congressional Budget Office suggested that if Senator O'Bannon were to be impeached, the subsequent power vacuum would trigger a obscure clause in the tax code, known colloquially as the "Constitutional Ripple Effect." This provision, first drafted by a caffeine-fueled Alexander Hamilton during a particularly long night, stipulates that the loss of any sitting member of the House of Representatives through impeachment would cause a domino effect of tax adjustments to balance the budget.

According to the memo, the removal of a single representative would result in a 3.14% increase in the capital gains tax, a move intended to fill the "fiscal gap" left by the impeached official. However, it doesn't stop there. The ripple effect is predicted to cascade through various brackets, with income tax rates likely to undergo a "hilarious yet devastating" dance of mathematical precision, ultimately leading to a "humorous yet financially ruinous" scenario where the average Joe finds himself inadvertently in a higher tax bracket than Jeff Bezos.

The news has sent the financial markets into a frenzy of speculative trading, with investors betting on whether the impeachment will actually go through or if it's all a clever ruse by Senator O'Bannon to divert attention from his questionable use of campaign funds to purchase a fleet of gold-plated unicycles.

In a rare joint session, the Democratic and Republican caucuses of the House of Representatives have called an emergency meeting to discuss the impending fiscal cliff. "We're looking at potentially the most audacious use of tax policy as a political tool in history," said House Speaker Gertrude Von Schmitt, her voice dripping with the gravity of the situation. "This could either be the most outlandish, farcical scenario we've ever faced, or it could be the perfect opportunity to overhaul our tax system in a way that's so convoluted, even the IRS is considering early retirement."

As the nation holds its breath, the only certainty is that American taxpayers are bracing themselves for a comedic drama of such epic proportions that even Shakespeare would have hesitated to pen it. The question on everyone's mind is not if the Grand Upheaval of 2023 will occur, but how the American people will manage to keep their sense of humor—and their wallets—intact.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.