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In a jaw-dropping turn of events that has left the nation's political landscape more charred than a marshmallow in a nuclear reactor, the House of Representatives has erupted into a blazing inferno of controversy over a proposed impeachment resolution against the embattled President Smirkington. The debate, which was initially expected to be a dull and tedious affair, quickly transformed into a full-blown conflagration of political gamesmanship, as lawmakers grappled with the existential threat of futurism to the sanctity of political tradition.

At the heart of the firestorm is the enigmatic Futurist Caucus, a group of forward-thinking legislators who believe that the President's refusal to embrace the coming age of flying cars, sentient AI, and holographic reality is an impeachable offense. These visionaries argue that the President's stance is not only a betrayal of the American public but also a direct affront to the potential for intergalactic colonization.

The impeachment resolution, drafted by the Caucus's chief futurist, Rep. Prognostica (D-Silicon Valley), and supported by a bipartisan coalition of lawmakers known as the United Front of Tomorrow, accuses President Smirkington of "willful neglect of the temporal imperatives that shall define our great nation's destiny." The document, which reads like a script from a sci-fi B-movie, claims that the President's policies are "as obsolete as a flip phone in a hologram arcade."

In a stunning display of political theater, the debate was punctuated by dramatic monologues from both sides of the aisle, with members donning futuristic attire and wielding holographic props to make their points. The chamber was awash with laser light shows and robotic legislative aides, as the United Front of Tomorrow unveiled a series of holographic projections depicting a dystopian future under President Smirkington's leadership.

Meanwhile, the President's defense team, known as the Timeless Guardians, countered with their own technological spectacle, projecting a series of images of the President shaking hands with iconic figures from history and fiction alike, including a holographic Albert Einstein and a virtual Captain Kirk. Their message was clear: President Smirkington is the steward of tradition and the guardian of the past, present, and future.

As the debate raged on, the House found itself in uncharted political territory, with the future of impeachment itself up for debate. The constitutionality of impeaching a sitting President for failing to embrace futurism was questioned by legal experts, leading to a series of intergalactic legal briefs filed by both sides.

In the end, the impeachment resolution was tabled indefinitely, as the House voted to form a special bipartisan committee to explore the implications of futurism on the American political system. The committee, aptly named the Time-Space Congressional Exploration Taskforce (TS-CET), will spend the next year studying the impact of emerging technologies on governance, ethics, and the fabric of society.

As the House of Representatives emerges from the smoldering ruins of this week's impeachment debate, one thing is clear: the future has never been more uncertain, and the politicians are determined to navigate this uncharted territory, even if it means charting a course through the stars.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.