Impeached 2 is an armchair politician's dream. Play today!

In a shocking turn of events, the House of Representatives has found itself at an unprecedented crossroads, with legislative proceedings taking a backseat to a nationwide mobile gaming craze. The game in question, "Swipe to Impeach," has inadvertently become the unlikely maestro of the legislative body's impeachment orchestra, with players from all walks of life wielding the power to influence the course of history with naught but their fingertips.

Developed by the enigmatic tech wizard, "CivicByte," "Swipe to Impeach" has become the unexpected darling of the political landscape, racking up millions of downloads and a staggering 99% positive rating. The game's simple yet addictive premise allows players to swipe their way through articles of impeachment, building up combo points that, when matched with the right "constitutional elements," trigger a virtual impeachment trial.

As the House's impeachment strategy meetings took on a decidedly juvenile air, the usual pontificating and political grandstanding gave way to animated discussions about the most effective swipe patterns and which in-game power-ups could hasten the legislative process. In a bizarre twist, some lawmakers reportedly attempted to incorporate actual Constitutionnal Combos" into their floor speeches, leading to a barrage of laughter and confusion among their peers.

The Senate, not to be outdone, has since launched its own "Senate Judiciary Tap Challenge," where senators compete to tap their way through complex legal arguments at breakneck speeds. The competition has reportedly improved their reflexes and allowed them to better comprehend the intricacies of the constitutional framework.

Meanwhile, the White House has issued a statement expressing "deep concern" over the nation's apparent shift in attention from pressing political issues to the whims of a mobile game. In a rare display of bipartisan unity, both sides of the aisle have agreed to a temporary recess, urging citizens to put down their devices and engage with the political process directly. However, this plea fell on deaf ears as the masses were too busy achieving high scores and unlocking new levels in "Swipe to Impeach."

As the nation awaits the next move from the House, one thing is clear: the Constitution, once a venerable blueprint of governance, has been reduced to a series of swipes and taps in the digital realm. Whether this marks the beginning of the end for traditional political engagement or the rise of a new form of civic participation remains to be seen. But one thing is certain: the next impeachment trial could very well be decided by the high scores of a mobile game.

Can't get enough of politics? Play Impeached 2 and become President of the U.S. today!

This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.