Impeached 2 is an armchair politician's dream. Play today!

In an extraordinary session that has sent shockwaves across the nation, the Congress has officially announced the launch of an unprecedented 'War-Time Impeachment' proceedings against the embattled President Pundit. The announcement, made by the Speaker of the House, Patricia "Peace" O'Rourke, comes amidst a series of scandalous revelations that have rocked the nation's political landscape to its core.

In a move that would make even the most seasoned political pundits do a double-take, the impeachment inquiry will reportedly take place concurrently with a massive disaster relief operation, funded by a hefty chunk of the federal budget, which has mysteriously disappeared and reappeared in the impeachment war chest. "It's a bit like having your cake and eating it too," quipped O'Rourke, while a stern-faced Republican leader, John "Justice" Thompson, accused the Democrats of playing a high-stakes game of impeachmentt poker' with the nation's stability as their chip.

The Commander-in-Chief, President Pundit, has responded by calling the impeachment a "witch hunt" and a "deep state ploy" to undermine his leadership during a time of national crisis, suggesting a grand conspiracy involving the weather, the economic markets, and, oddly enough, a legion of sentient hurricanes. Meanwhile, a group of prominent military advisors, led by General Gabriel Gravity, have come warward with a controversial plan to deploy a fleet of drones specifically designed to distribute aid while simultaneously surveilling lawmakers during the impeachment proceedings.

As the nation gears up for what is being hailed as the first 'War-Time Impeachment' in history, many are left to wonder if this is indeed the dystopian future foretold by Orwell, or just another Tuesday in Washington. One thing is for sure: the political theater has reached new heights of absurdity, and the popcorn sales are expected to skyrocket.

In related news, the Federal Reserve has announced a new cryptocurrency, "FedCoin," which will allegedly be immune to both political turmoil and natural disasters. Investors are buying up the digital currency faster than one can say "quantitative easing," hoping it will provide some stability in these turbulent times. However, skeptics point out that it might just be another wildcard in this already explosive situation. Only time will tell if FedCoin will be the savior of the economy or just another chapter in the saga of America's bizarre political spectacle.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.