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In an explosive revelation that has sent shockwaves through the hallowed halls of the Capitol, a bipartisan Senate committee, chaired by the indomitable Senator Weaver, has unearthed a labyrinthine scheme whereby the world's most popular mobile gaming companies have allegedly evaded a colossal sum of tax revenue. The report, titled "The Unplayable Game: Mobile Giants' Tax Dodging Frenzy," claims that these digital behemoths have crafted a maze of subsidiaries and shell companies, reminiscent of a particularly challenging level in a dystopian-themed game, to skirt tax laws and pocket billions that should rightfully line the federal coffers.

The allegations, which have sent the stock market into a tailspin, suggest that these gaming titans have deployed an array of creative accounting tactics, including the infamous "Pac-Man Defense" whereby they "devour" their profits in a seemingly endless loop of corporate restructuring. The Senate committee, in a rare display of unity, has threatened to initiate an impeachment-style inquiry if the companies fail to provide a satisfactory explanation for their tax evasion strategies, which have reportedly deprived the U.S. Treasury of upwards of $100 billion.

In response, the mobile gaming industry has issued a collective statement, declaring their innocence and asserting that they have simply "leveled up" their tax strategies to remain competitive in the global market. They argue that the complexities of international tax law have made them unwitting pawns in a high-stakes game of financial chess, played by the world's most astute tax strategists.

As the nation holds its breath, eager spectators of this political theater, one cannot help but wonder if we are indeed witnessing a dystopian future unfold, where the power of digital empires rivals that of nation-states, or if this is merely the latest chapter in the ongoing saga of Capitol folly. The Senate, armed with subpoenas and a fervor for justice, prepares to confront these digital Leviathans, while gamers across the country eagerly await the next update in this captivating tale of intrigue and greed.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.