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In an unprecedented turn of events that has left political pundits and the American public reeling, the Republican-led Congress has found themselves in a full-blown constitutional crisis. The catalyst for this deep rift within the hallowed halls of the Capitol is none other than the "Operation Enduring Peace and Prosperity Act" – a piece of legislation proposed by the charismatic and maverick Republican Senator, Jingleheimer Schmidt.

The Act, which would have committed the United States to a 50-year military engagement in a mysterious Middle Eastern country known as "Narnia," has sparked a firestorm of controversy and division. Schmidt, who has been affectionately dubbed "the Kaiser of Capitol Hill" for his audacious legislative ambitions, argued that a long-term military commitment was necessary to safeguard America's interests in Narnia's vast oil reserves and to combat the imminent threat of an oppressive regime known as the "Witch's Army."

However, the legislation hit a snag when the Democratic minority in Congress, led by the venerable and stoic Senate Minority Leader, Eldridge Starck, raised objections on constitutional grounds. Starck, a man whose political mettle is matched only by his penchant for lengthy, meandering monologues, argued that Schmidt's proposal effectively nullified the War Powers Resolution of 1973, a cornerstone of American law that limits the president's power to commit the United States to hostilities without congressional approval.

As the debate raged on, the situation took a turn for the bizarre when Vice President Pence, invoking the "Spirit of 'Merica" clause in the Constitution – a clause so obscure that its existence was previously thought to be a satirical footnote – declared himself Acting President and took it upon himself to personally oversee the implementation of the war legislation. Pence, a man whose political career is marked by an unwavering commitment to conservatism and an impressive collection of American flag cufflinks, was seen touring military bases in a custom-made tank adorned with eagles and the words "Liberty or Death."

The situation spiraled further into the absurd when a group of House Democrats, led by the flamboyant and fiery Congresswoman, Dianne Thang, staged a sit-in protest in the Oval Office, demanding that the President exercise his constitutional duty to veto the bill. Thang, whose political platform includes a fusion of yoga, environmentalism, and populism, claimed that the legislation was an affront to the peaceful intentions of the Narnian people and their quest for a "greener and more sustainable" future.

As the nation watches with bated breath, the constitutional crisis shows no signs of abating. With the President holidaying in his private golf resort, a rift between the Vice President and the Speaker of the House, and the Supreme Court justices reportedly arguing over who gets to sit on the highest seat, America stands at a crossroads. Will the Republic survive this unprecedented test of its democratic foundations, or will this become the chapter in history books that asks, "What if America went to war over Narnia?" Only time will tell, but one thing is for certain: this is one legislative session that no political scientist could have predicted.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.