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In a stunning turn of events that has sent shockwaves through the fabric of American society, the government has announced a groundbreaking initiative to assert total control over all war-related narratives. Dubbed "Operation Irony Curtain," this ambitious plan is set to roll out nationwide, promising to "enhance national security" by suppressing any dissenting voices that dare question the government's war agenda.

The public, already reeling from a series of controversial measures that have eroded personal freedoms, is outraged. "It's like living in a George Orwell novel," exclaimed Patricia "Freedom Fries" Smith, a local librarian and activist. "Next thing you know, we'll be reading state-approved history books that claim 'War is Peace'."

In a rare press conference held in a dimly lit bunker adorned with military paraphernalia, Secretary of Defense "Major" Maddox declared, "In these uncertain times, we must ensure that the narrative remains steadfast and unwavering. Any alternative facts or fake news that suggest our military actions are anything less than heroic and necessary will be met with the full force of our government's propaganda machine."

The initiative, which has been fast-tracked through the legislative process with the help of a few unnamed lawmakers, has sparked widespread controversy. Critics argue that it's yet another step warards an Orwellian dystopia, where freedom of speech is a relic of the past. Supporters, on the other hand, hail it as a necessary measure to protect the homeland from both foreign and domestic threats.

In a bizarre twist, the government has also enlisted the help of satirical journalists to peddle their message. These "humorists," as they're being called, are tasked with spinning the narrative in such a way that the public will be none the wiser to the erosion of their civil liberties. "It's all about irony and subtext," explained "Witty" Wilson, a renowned satirist who has taken on the mission. "We're making war control sound so ridiculous that people will just laugh it off, completely missing the fact that they're being manipulated."

As the nation grapples with the implications of Operation Irony Curtain, one thing is clear: the line between satire and reality has been blurred to the point of invisibility. In this new era of government-sanctioned humor, the truth may very well be the only casualty of war.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.