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In an unprecedented move that has left political pundits and futurists alike rubbing their eyes in disbelief, the next President of the United States has pledged to shape the Supreme Court into a panel of quantum physicists, AI ethicists, and time-traveling experts. This groundbreaking agenda, detailed in a leaked document from the President's top-secret "DeLorean Task Force," aims to ensure that the highest court in the land is equipped to navigate the complex legal challenges of a future where the fabric of reality is as malleable as Play-Doh and your digital twin can commit a crime in your stead.

The President, a charismatic figure known as "Future-Proof Frank," has promised to work with the House of Representatives to pass the "Quantum Juris Prudence Act," which would mandate that all future Supreme Court justices have a PhD in a field related to speculative science, including but not limited to interdimensional travel, consciousness transfer, and cryptographic law.

In a recent campaign speech, Future-Proof Frank proclaimed, "The Supreme Court has been the bedrock of our legal system for over two centuries, but let's face it, the world has changed. We've got smart toasters with more processing power than the Apollo Guidance Computer, and our laws are still stuck in the horse-and-buggy era. It's time for a bench that can keep up with the times!"

Critics argue that this is a slippery slope towards a judicial system that is too complex for the average citizen to understand, potentially leading to a government by and for mad scientists and tech moguls. However, Future-Proof Frank has dismissed these concerns, assuring the public that his administration will also implement "Citizen's Quantum Legal Literacy Programs" to help the masses decipher the intricacies of quantum law.

The President's campaign has also hinted at the possibility of the first holographic Supreme Court proceedings, where justices could theoretically exist in multiple places at once, potentially speeding up the decision-making process and allowing for real-time appeals from the comfort of your own living room.

As the election looms, voters are left to ponder whether they are ready to entrust the future of their country to a Supreme Court that might one day have to rule on cases involving sentient AI or the rights of a consciousness uploaded to a server in a parallel universe. One thing is certain: the next President's agenda will undoubtedly leave a mark on the legal landscape that will be debated and deciphered for eons to come.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.