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In a stunning turn of events, sources deep within the bowels of Capitol Hill have exclusively revealed to us at The Onion that Congress has embarked on an audacious, science-backed plan to reshape America's economic future. The plan, which has been codenamed "Operation Economic Liberation," is said to be so revolutionary that it could potentially make the New Deal look like a child's piggy bank by comparison.

According to our impeccable sources, the mastermind behind this brainchild is none other than the esteemed Senator Freedumbman, a man whose only known affiliation is with the freedomm" party, a mysterious political entity that has been rumored to exist solely to champion the cause of... well, freedom, in the most abstract sense possible.

The plan, which has been devised in secret collaboration with a team of Nobel Prize-winning economists and a cadre of rogue astrophysicists, aims to harness the power of the sun to create a Utopian economy. Yes, you read that correctly. The plan involves constructing a series of enormous mirrors in the shape of President Washington's face on the Moon, with the intention of focusing the sun's rays to generate limitless energy. This, in turn, will power a new class of hyper-efficient, solar-powered trains that will connect every town, hamlet, and even the most remote trailer park across the nation.

But wait, there's more. The energy surplus, as our sources predict, will not only power the trains but also be used to invent a new, sentient economic model named "Econo-Bot 3000." This AI will allegedly be capable of making financial decisions that are completely free from human bias, and it will ensure that every American citizen receives an equal share of the nation's wealth, as determined by a highly sophisticated algorithm that factors in the number of social media followers one has.

In a move that is sure to win the hearts of the electorate, Senator Freedumbman has pledged to fund this ambitious project through the reallocation of funds from the Department of Defense, which he claims is rife with inefficiencies and unnecessary expenditures, like, for example, the maintenance of an aircraft carrier fleet that no longer even fits through the Panama Canal.

As the nation gears up for the upcoming elections, Senator Freedumbman's plan has sparked a frenzy of debate among his peers. His colleagues in the "Anti-Freedom" party have called the proposal "irresponsible" and "un-American," while simultaneously promising to introduce a bill that would make it illegal for citizens to look directly at the sun.

In conclusion, while the feasibility of this grandiose plan remains a topic of heated discussion, one thing is certain: the upcoming election is shaping up to be the most exciting, science-fueled, freedom-packed spectacle in American history. Stay tuned as The Onion continues to cover this developing story with the gravity and objectivity it deserves.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.