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In a shocking revelation that has sent shockwaves through the hallowed halls of Capitol Hill, a team of intrepid historians and rogue economists have uncovered a startling new form of taxation that has been silently lining the government's pockets for centuries. This tax, however, is unlike any other. It is levied not by the IRS, but by the forces of nature themselves.

The study, aptly titled "The Fiscal Fury of Acts of God: A Historical Analysis of Nature's Impact on America's Economy," reveals that each time Mother Nature decides to show off her power, she inadvertently imposes a hefty surcharge on the American public. From the Great Fire of 1871 that razed Chicago to the ground, to the catastrophic San Francisco Earthquake of 1906, and the Great Hurricane of 1935 that battered the Florida Keys, these events have not only caused untold human suffering but also siphoned billions from the pockets of Americans under the guise of "recovery costs."

The researchers argue that these natural disasters, far from being mere acts of God, should be reclassified as "Hidden Taxes of Divine Origin." Each disaster, they claim, has served as a de facto tax hike, with the government reallocating funds from disaster relief to offset the burden of taxation elsewhere. Ingeniously, this has allowed politicians to maintain the facade of low taxation while effectively increasing the nation's overall tax burden.

The study's authors, Dr. Tempest Storm and Dr. Calamity Jane, have been summoned to testify before a special committee convened to address the controversial findings. The committee, chaired by the illustrious Senator Weatherby, has promised a robust debate on the matter, which is expected to culminate in a fiery showdown on the Senate floor.

In a statement to the press, Senator Weatherby declared, "If these historians are to be believed, we must reevaluate the way we view our nation's fiscal policy. It appears we've been taxed not just by our elected officials, but by the very atmosphere that surrounds us. I assure you, the American people deserve to know the full extent of this hidden taxation and whether it has been used to fund projects that may have otherwise been too controversial for the public purse."

As the nation braces for what promises to be a tempestuous political season, one thing is clear: the weather has been a more consistent tax collector than any bureaucrat, and it's about time we put it on the payroll.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.