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In a stunning turn of events that has left political pundits and constituents alike reeling, the impeached leader, known as Ex-President Opus, has found himself at the center of a bipartisan disaster relief bill, just days after his historic impeachment for "Inappropriate Tweeting and general tomfoolery."

The bill, dubbed "The Futuristic Aid to Uplift Disasters (F.A.U.D.) Act," was unveiled today by a strange coalition of Democrats and a handful of rogue Republicans who have breaked away from their party's supposed disasteraster stance. The act, which aims to provide relief to areas affected by everything from extraterrestrial invasions to sudden dips in the space-time continuum, has been met with both applause and confusion.

"It's a win-win," exclaimed Senator Future (D-NY), a freshman senator whose campaign was predicated on a platform of unattainable promises and sci-fi soundbites. "We're not only helping those in need, but we're also laying the groundwork for a reality where disasters are a thing of the past. Or at least, a thing of the future."

In a related turn of events, Ex-President Opus, who has been quietly riding out his impeachmenthment life in a bunker beneath the Capitol, emerged to endorse the bill. His endorsement came in the form of a series of tweets, each more erratic than the last, which he claimed were encoded messages from a superintelligent AI designed to manipulate global financial markets.

The bill's provision of aid to victims of "time-slip incidents" has also sparked a flurry of activity among scientists and historians. Dr. Temporal (Ph.D. in futurismurism), who has been consulting on the bill, explained, "We've seen a marked increase in temporal anomalies, particularly in areas that were key battlegrounds in the last election. It's imperative that we address these slips in time, lest we create a paradox where no one can remember who their representatives are."

As the F.A.U.D. Act makes its way through Congress, with Ex-President Opus leading the charge from his Twitter lair, many are left to ponder the true intentions behind this peculiar alliance. Is it a genuine effort to help those in need, or a desperate ploy by politicos to secure their legacies in a future that may no longer have room for them?

One thing is certain: in the world of politics, where reality is often a flexible concept, the only constant is change. And as for the F.A.U.D. Act, it's either going to be a lifeline for the victims of bizarre and unforeseen disasters, or it's going to be the most elaborate time travel scheme the world has ever seen. Buckle up, folks—the future is here, and it's as uncertain as ever.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.