Impeached 2 is an armchair politician's dream. Play today!

In an unprecedented turn of events, sources close to the White House have exclusively revealed to us at The Onion's Factual News Division that the ongoing political gamesmanship between the two major parties has escalated to a level that could be described as nothing short of a full-blown simulated war. Insiders report that the recent legislative standoff has evolved into a complex tabletop exercise, complete with miniature figures representing members of Congress, intricately detailed terrain models of the Capitol building, and an array of die-cast vehicles simulating the political "tanks" of each party.

The Democrats, led by the charismatic and eloquently named President Windham, have been strategically positioning their "diplomatic troops" around the "negotiation table" while the Republicans, under the command of the formidable Senator Ironfist, have been fortifying their "obstructionist strongholds" with an arsenal of legislative filibusters and procedural roadblocks. The escalation reached its peak when a rogue "super PAC" launched a surprise attack using a fleet of drone buzzwords, which resulted in a temporary shutdown of the legislative "airspace."

In response, President Windham deployed a squadron of "fact-checking drones" to counter the propaganda, leading to a fierce aerial battle of spin and misinformation that could only be resolved by a panel of impartial, unbiased comedians. The comedic mediators, clad in official vests emblazoned with the motto "Keep Us Laughing," managed to bring both sides to the table for a ceasefire, which was promptly broken when a stray pun from the Democratic side inadvertently triggered a landmine of satirical outrage from the Republican ranks.

As the nation watches with bated breath, the political theater continues to unfold with the gravity and urgency of a Shakespearean drama. With each passing day, the line between political satire and actual governance blurs, leaving citizens both entertained and bewildered. The future of the nation hangs in the balance, as the Government plays hardball, and the only certainty is that, win or lose, this will be a game no one will forget.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.