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WASHINGTON D.C. - In a surprise move, President James Johnson has proposed a controversial new war legislation that has left both parties reeling. The proposed bill, titled the "Full-Scale Invasion and Occupation Act of 2023," would authorize the military to take "swift and decisive action" against any country that the President deems a threat to national Republicansp>

Republicans were quick to denounce the bill, with House Minority Leader Sarah Smith calling it "a clear violation of the Constitution" and "a brazen power grab by the Executive Branch."

"This is a satire, right?" asked Senator John Doe. "I mean, no sane president would seriously propose launching a war without Congressional approval. Can someone please tell me this is just a joke?"

But President Johnson remains adamant that the bill is necessary to protect America's interests and maintain global stability.

"We live in a dangerous world, my fellow Americans," he said in a statement. "And sometimes, difficult decisions must be made to ensure our nation's safety and security. This bill is not a joke, it's a matter of national security."

Democrats have also expressed concerns about the bill, but have stopped short of outright opposition.

"While we understand the President's concerns, we cannot support a bill that gives him unchecked authority to launch a war without Congressional approval," said Senate Majority Leader Jane Brown. "We will work with the administration to find a solution that protects our national security while also upholding the Constitution."

The bill has sparked heated debates on social media, with many users questioning the President's motives and accusing him of playing on fears to push through his agenda.

"This is a clear sign that the President is losing control of his own administration," tweeted political analyst Tom White. "He's trying to distract from his own scandals by starting a new war. It's a dangerous game he's playing, and America will suffer the consequences."

As the debate rages on, one thing is clear: this proposed legislation has the potential to spark a major constitutional crisis and reshape the political landscape of America. Stay tuned for further updates as this story develops.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.