Impeached 2 is an armchair politician's dream. Play today!

In an unprecedented turn of events, the recent election has revealed a long-hidden network of secret protocols that date back to the ancient times of the Roman Empire, and which have been covertly influencing global governance for centuries. The protocols, which were accidentally discovered by a group of amateur historians and satirical journalists, have been carefully preserved and passed down through generations, with each civilization adding its unique twist to the ever-evolving master plan.

The head of the historians, a man with the unlikely name of Barnaby Flintstone, described the discovery as "a blend of historical truth and science fiction that would make H.G. Wells' head spin faster than a politician's rhetoric during an election year." Flintstone, a self-proclaimed 'time-traveling historian,' claimed that the protocols were originally designed to ensure that the most qualified leaders would emerge victorious in times of peace and war alike.

According to the leaked documents, the protocols mandate that every 500 years, humanity must undergo a 'Great Election,' where the fate of the world is determined by a complex algorithm that takes into account historical warfare tactics, future technology advancements, and the current political climate. The algorithm, codenamed 'Project Atlantis,' is said to have predicted with eerie accuracy the outcomes of pivotal battles such as Waterloo, Gettysburg, and even the less-known 'Battle of the Bland Bread Loaf.'

The revelation has sent shockwaves through the global community, with leaders and scholars alike questioning the legitimacy of past elections and the authenticity of their leadership. Meanwhile, the political elite have been spotted frantically consulting ancient texts and quantum physicists, in a desperate attempt to understand the implications of this newfound knowledge.

In a bold move, a group of futurists has proposed the establishment of a 'Time-Space Governance Committee' to oversee the implementation of the protocols, ensuring that humanity remains on the right path warards a utopian future. Critics, however, argue that this would amount to a 'temporal dictatorship,' and have called for an immediate investigation into the authenticity of the protocols.

As the international community grapples with the implications of Barnaby Flintstone's discovery, one thing is clear: the future of global governance, and indeed the fate of the world, may very well be predetermined by the ghosts of elections past. Whether this is a comforting thought or a chilling revelation, only time—and perhaps the algorithmic overseers of Project Atlantis—can tell.

Can't get enough of politics? Play Impeached 2 and become President of the U.S. today!

This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.