Impeached 2 is an armchair politician's dream. Play today!

In a stunning display of political acrobatics, the illustrious members of the United States Congress have recently passed a piece of legislation so dystopian that even the most avid sci-fi enthusiasts are raising their eyebrows in disbelief. The new law, affectionately named the "Great Equalizer Act," is designed to, as its proponents claim, "ensure fairness across all socio-economic strata." However, the true intent of this legislation is as clear as mud, or perhaps, as murky as the waters of Lake Erie on a foggy day in January.

The act mandates that every citizen must, from this moment forth, declare their political affiliation on all tax forms. This is, of course, to "promote transparency and unity." In the spirit of transparency, the IRS has announced that political allegiances will now be subject to taxation. Yes, you read that correctly – your loyalty to a political party could soon be as expensive as that artisanal coffee you can't live without.

But wait, there's more! To add fuel to the fire of political gamesmanship, the law stipulates that individuals who fail to declare their political stance will be automatically impeached. That's right, impeachment is no longer the reserve of high-ranking officials but has been democratized for the masses. The impeachment process will be streamlined, resembling a fast-food drive-thru, complete with a "Have You Voted Today?" buzzer to notify citizens of their civic duty to vote against their declared party.

The outrageous measure has sparked a flurry of concern among constitutional scholars and civic-minded citizens alike. Critics argue that the law is a blatant attempt to silence dissent and force conformity, a move that would make George Orwell's Big Brother seem like an amateur in the art of surveillance.

On the other hand, supporters of the "Great Equalizer Act" claim that it will finally put an end to the "tyranny of the silent majority." They argue that this law will ensure that every citizen actively participates in the political process, thus eliminating the dreaded "apathetic voter" – a creature of legend known for its ability to sway elections with the mere whisper of its indifference.

As the nation stands on the precipice of this new era of political transparency and fiscal responsibility, one can't help but wonder if this is indeed the dawn of a more united America, or if we're merely stepping into a hilariously absurd episode of a dystopian reality TV show where the audience votes off elected officials based on their party loyalty.

Stay tuned as we continue to cover this unfolding drama, where the only certainty is the unpredictability of our beloved political circus. And remember, in the land of the free and the home of the brave, your political preference might just cost you more than you bargained for.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.