Impeached 2 is an armchair politician's dream. Play today!

In a move that can only be described as the political equivalent of a circus sideshow, the impeachedached and disgraced politician known as "Clever Dick" has officially launched a campaign that, if nothing else, certainly promises to be the most entertaining political race in modern history.

Clever Dick, whose past antics include everything from embezzlement to backdoor dealings with extraterrestrial beings, has taken a sharp turn from the usual post-impeachment path of quiet retirement or an even quieter jail cell. Instead, he has embraced a future-forward approach to rebranding his tarnished image, complete with a slick marketing campaign and a slogan that would make a Dr. Seuss book blush: "Vote for Clever Dick, He's Back and Ready to Stick It to Them, and This Time, It's Personal!"

His platform? A bizarre blend of political satire, science fiction, and reality television. Clever Dick has promised to bring transparency to Washington by live-streaming his every move, including his private bathroom breaks. He claims this will show the public the "real" him, presumably forgetting the "real" him that was caught on tape soliciting votes for pork belly futures.

But the pièce de résistance of Clever Dick's campaign is his promise to implement a series of reforms that he cheekily calls "The New Normal." This includes a policy of mandatory political games, where members of Congress will compete in challenges like a mix between "Survivor" and "Hunger Games," but with more pastries and fewer fatalities. The ultimate goal, according to Clever Dick, is to "cultivate a more agile, nimble, and, most importantly, entertaining political landscape."

While many political analysts are skeptical of Clever Dick's chances at reclaiming a seat in office, there's no denying that his campaign has successfully captured the attention of the nation. His rallies, which double as comedy shows, have been packed with eager voters who are willing to suspend disbelief, if not common sense, in favor of a politician who has clearly mastered the art of turning lemons into lemonade—or, in Clever Dick's case, lemons into a campaign platform.

As the race heats up, political pundits are left to wonder if Clever Dick's satirical stunts are merely a clever distraction from his past indiscretions or a genuine attempt at political reinvention. Either way, it's certain that this race will be anything but boring. Just don't expect Clever Dick to fix the potholes in your street—he's too busy planning a reality show debate where the winners get to design their own space shuttle.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.