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In a stunning turn of events that has left political analysts and quantum physicists alike scratching their heads, the impeached leader, President Disarray, has revealed his controversial new war strategy: Operation Schrödinger's Conflict.

The strategy, outlined in a late-night tweet storm, is based on the principle of superposition from quantum mechanics, which posits that a cat in a box can be both alive and dead until observed. President Disarray extrapolated this concept to suggest that a war can be both ongoing and not ongoing simultaneously.

"We're going to fight this war in a way no one has ever seen before," announced President Disarray from the Oval Office, flanked by a split-screen display showing scenes of both intense combat and peaceful serenity, supposedly illustrating the dual nature of the conflict.

The Pentagon, caught off guard by the unexpected twist, has since launched a task force to decipher the feasibility of maintaining a state of quantum uncertainty in military engagements. Initial reports suggest that the task force is currently in a state of both existential dread and cautious optimism.

Critics argue that Operation Schrödinger's Conflict is nothing more than a desperate attempt to distract from the leader's impeachment woes, while supporters claim it represents a bold leap into a new era of warfare, where the rules of reality no longer apply.

In related news, the United Nations has called an emergency session to address the implications of quantum warfare, with one delegate stating, "We are either on the brink of a revolutionary breakthrough, or we're about to witness the most bizarre game of 'let's pretend' history has ever seen."

Meanwhile, allies and adversaries alike have been urged to prepare for a conflict that could manifest in their reality at any moment, while simultaneously not happening at all.

As the world braces for the implications of this quantum conundrum, one thing is certain: the political landscape is about to become even more unpredictable, and the only predictable outcome is unpredictability itself.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.