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In a move that has sent shockwaves through the hallowed halls of Capitol Hill, sources close to the Democratic Party have leaked details of a clandestine operation to rewrite the nation's taxation laws under the guise of constitutional interpretation. The plan, which has been codenamed "The Great Recalibration," aims to fundamentally alter the financial landscape of the country, with the Senate at the helm of this audacious endeavor.

According to the leaked documents, obtained by our intrepid investigative team at The Onion, the Democrats have devised a complex scheme to interpret the Constitution in a manner that not only justifies a complete overhaul of the tax code but also empowers the federal government to levy taxes on thoughts, dreams, and even the mere potential for future income.

The mastermind behind this plot is none other than Senator Dollarbills, a seasoned legislator with a penchant for fiscal innovation and a questionable interpretation of the Founding Fathers' intentions. The plan allegedly involves a series of arcane legislative maneuvers that would allow the Senate to invoke a seldom-used constitutional clause that grants them the power to tax any and all abstract concepts.

The proposed legislation, titled "The Thought Taxation Act," would require every citizen to file annual tax returns not only for their earnings but also for their mental activities. The tax rate for daydreaming about winning the lottery is said to be particularly steep, with a proposed 95% tax on all "fantasy income."

Moreover, the plan includes a provision for the "Dream Dividend," a controversial program that would award the government a share of the revenue generated from the monetization of dreams. Nightly visions of grandeur and aspirations of wealth would no longer be the private domain of the individual but a shared asset, subject to government scrutiny and, of course, taxation.

The Democrats argue that this bold initiative is a necessary step to address the nation's ballooning deficit and to fund a plethora of new social programs. Critics, however, have denounced the plan as an egregious overreach of government power and a blatant violation of individual rights.

As the controversy continues to unfold, the nation watches with bated breath to see whether this satirical take on fiscal policy will become a reality or remain a humorous footnote in the annals of American political history. One thing is for certain: the Senate's upcoming debates are sure to be as thrilling as a roller coaster ride at the height of summer. Buckle up, America, because it seems that this time, the joke might just be on us.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.