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In a bizarre twist of events that has sent shockwaves through the political and gaming communities alike, the latest mobile gaming sensation, "Finger Frenzy: The Capitalist Quest," has inadvertently revealed a groundbreaking economic policy proposed by none other than President Ronald Washington III.

The game, a frantic tapper that sees players amassing virtual wealth through a series of increasingly absurd tasks, such as milking hovering cows and mining floating asteroids, was initially dismissed as a harmless distraction. However, eagle-eyed players with a penchant for political satire stumbled upon a hidden message encoded within the game's algorithm.

The message, which was broadcasted during a peak-hour server rush, outlined a policy that would see the government taking a leaf out of the game's book by introducing a new economic model: "Taponomy." This radical approach encourages the public to tap their way to prosperity, with the government's role being reduced to a mere facilitator, providing a platform for citizens to tap more efficiently.

The policy, which has been met with a mix of bewilderment and intrigue, proposes the abolishment of traditional economic sectors, replacing them with Taponomy Departments. These departments will oversee the nation's tap-based transactions and interactions, with the aim of boosting the GDP by a projected 500% through increased tap engagements.

The Republican party, known for its staunch support of capitalist endeavors, has expressed tentative support for the initiative, with a spokesperson commenting, "If our economy can be revitalized by simply tapping our screens until our fingers fall off, then we're all for it. It's a gamble, but isn't that what capitalism is all about?"

Critics, however, have slammed the proposal as a "digital mirage," with one economist remarking, "The idea that we can transfer the mechanics of a mobile game into real-world economics is not only nonsensical but also dangerously naive."

As the nation grapples with the prospect of a tap-centric economy, President Ronald Washington III remains tight-lipped, leaving the public to ponder the potential consequences of turning their smartphones into the ultimate arbiters of economic success.

In related news, the mobile game's developers have released a statement insisting that the hidden message was nothing more than an inside joke, and that they have no intention of influencing national policy. However, with the game's popularity skyrocketing and the hashtag #Taponomy taking the internet by storm, it seems the joke may already be on us.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.