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In an explosive revelation that has rocked the very foundations of Capitol Hill, documents unearthed from the dusty archives of the House of Representatives' secret underground library have shed light on a centuries-long conspiracy that has shaped the modern debate over taxation. The conspiracy, it turns out, is not a new one, but rather an ancient conflict between two clandestine societies within the hallowed halls of Congress: The Order of the High-Titled and the Brotherhood of the Common Purse.

The Order of the High-Titled, a group of aristocratic descendants with a penchant for lavish robes and antiquated titles, has been manipulating tax laws to maintain their opulent lifestyles at the expense of the common citizen. Their secret motto, "Let them eat credit," hints at their disdain for the financial woes of the common folk. The Brotherhood of the Common Purse, on the other hand, is a band of Robin Hood-esque fiscal freedom fighters who have been clandestinely advocating for tax policies that favor the little guy, with their unofficial creed being, "Taxation is theft, unless it's for the masses."

The historical struggle between these two groups has been so carefully orchestrated that even the most astute political analysts have been none the wiser. The House and Senate have long been battlegrounds for these shadowy adversaries, with each side taking turns in controlling the legislative agenda to push their own agenda forward. The recent tax overhaul debates are just the latest chapter in this enduring saga.

Insiders report that the tension between the two factions has reached an all-time high, with whispers of clandestine meetings, coded messages, and even the occasional duel of wits in the form of congressional hearings. The conflict has become so intense that it is rumored that a special committee has been formed to mediate the dispute, consisting of a bipartisan group of lawmakers who are themselves unaware of the true nature of their assigned task.

As the nation watches with bated breath, the outcome of this historical struggle could redefine the way Americans view their tax dollars and the individuals who wield the power to decide where those funds should flow. Will the common citizen finally see a reduction in their tax burden, or will the High-Titled maintain their financial dominance? Only time will tell, but one thing is certain: the secret war over taxation has been waged for far longer than any of us have been led to believe.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.