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In a stunning revelation that has sent shockwaves through the political landscape, sources close to the Oval Office have leaked top-secret documents indicating that President BeltwayBob and his shadowy advisor, the enigmatic "Justice" Jared, have been orchestrating a complex scheme to manipulate the composition of the Supreme Court. The plot, as detailed in the papers, aims to reshape the nation's highest judicial body just weeks before the upcoming Senate spectacle, in a desperate bid to tilt the balance in favor of a radical redefinition of tax policy.

According to the classified documents, the President's team has been covertly recruiting a cadre of judicial pawns, each handpicked for their pliable stances on economic legislation. The supreme goal, it seems, is to dismantle the century-old principle of equitable taxation, replacing it with a regressive system that disproportionately burdens the less affluent.

Insiders report that the President's plan involves a series of legislative Hail Marys, designed to pass before the new Supreme Court justices are sworn in. These laws, which have been crafted in the dead of night by a team of unregistered lobbyists, are rumored to include a repeal of the progressive tax rate, the introduction of a flat tax system, and the elimination of certain popular deductions, all but ensuring that the tax burden will be shifted squarely onto the shoulders of the working class.

The timing of this revelation could not be more critical, as the nation gears up for a fierce Senate election, where control of the legislative branch hangs in the balance. Candidates from both parties have denounced the President's underhanded tactics, with one political pundit declaring, "This isn't politics as usual; it's political alchemy, turning the golden goose of the American middle class into a lame duck before our very eyes!"

As the scandal unfolds, the American public finds itself at a crossroads, with the integrity of the electoral process and the very foundation of tax law hanging in the balance. Will the Senate stand firm against this judicial juggernaut, or will the courts become the final battleground in a war over who pays their fair share? Stay tuned as this story develops, and remember, in politics, truth is often stranger than fiction – and just as taxing.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.