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In a series of bizarre and unprecedented events, Congress has officially declared its independence from the United States. In a shocking turn of events, the newly formed Congressional Republic announced that it will operate under a new constitution, which mandates that any leader who is impeached must take up a new career as a professional clown at the nation's capital.

The decision came after a heated debate where lawmakers from both parties unanimously agreed that the only fitting punishment for an impeached leader, whom we shall call "Jovial M. Clown," was to don a colorful wig and oversized shoes, and entertain the masses with a juggling act on the Capitol's east lawn.

"The American people have spoken, and they've demanded a new kind of political leadership," said Speaker of the House, Laughter Laughington, during a press conference held inside a circus tent pitched on the Capitol steps. "Our nation's founder, P.T. Barnum, once said, 'Without promotion, something terrible happens... nothing!' Well, folks, we're promoting a new era of transparency and joy in our hallowed halls."

The new constitution, penned by none other than satirical journalist and constitutional scholar, Jonathon Swiftly, includes articles such as "The Right to Laughter," which guarantees citizens the right to a chuckle at least once a day, and "The Bill of Clowning," which outlines the responsibilities of the newly impeached leader, including performing daily comedy routines, creating a children's TV show, and writing a weekly satirical column for the Congressional Gazette.

Citizens across the country are flocking to the Capitol to witness the first performance of the new era. Ticket sales for "Clown M. Jovial's Grand Spectacular" have broken all previous records, and souvenir stands are selling out of novelty hats and hand-crafted rubber chickens.

Meanwhile, political analysts are split on the implications of this radical shift in governance. Some argue that this is a brilliant strategy to reinvigorate public trust in politics, while others fear it may be a ploy to distract from the serious issues at hand.

"This is either the most ingenious move in political history, or the greatest joke ever played on the American people," remarked political pundit, Witty Windbag, during a heated debate on the Cable News Network's "Circus of Politics." "But one thing is certain: the next few months are going to be the most entertaining in the history of our great nation."

As the nation gears up for what is sure to be a series of baffling and uproarious political events, one thing is clear: Congress is no longer just a branch of government—it's the main attraction. And with "Jovial M. Clown" at the helm, the show is guaranteed to go on, with or without a quorum.

Can't get enough of politics? Play Impeached 2 and become President of the U.S. today!

This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.