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In an extraordinary turn of events that has left political pundits and economists alike staggered, a recent Constitutional crisis has inadvertently set the stage for what could be the next major global conflict. At the heart of this imbroglio is a seemingly mundane issue: tax policy.

The maelstrom began when the illustrious and esteemed President Hirsute Decibel, in a move that many are calling "unprecedented and deeply unconstitutional," decided to unilaterally rewrite the nation's tax code. In an attempt to fund his ambitious infrastructure program, President Decibel's new tax policy proposed that every citizen must pay a tax based on the volume of their voice, aptly named the "Loudness Levy."

The Loudness Levy was met with immediate resistance from the opposition-controlled Congress of Dour Faces, who argued that such a policy not only violated the sacred principles enshrined in the Constitution but also the Geneva Convention. Meanwhile, a faction of rogue economists, known as the Cacophony Consortium, hailed the Loudness Levy as a revolutionary step warards "auditory equity," claiming it would democratize economic opportunity for all, regardless of wealth or social status.

As the nation grappled with this audacious reinterpretation of fiscal governance, the international community watched with bated breath. Global markets trembled, and economic experts the world over fretted over the potential domino effect. Nations with their own stringent tax codes, from the Silent State of Tranquility to the Resounding Republic of Volume, began to eye each other with suspicion.

The situation escalated when President Decibel, in a move that can only be described as a clear violation of the Logan Act, dispatched a fleet of supersonic jet planes to perform a series of loud flyovers over the Congress of Dour Faces, directly correlating the decibel levels of the flyovers to the citizens' tax bills. The Congress responded by initiating a series of "Quiet Protests," where citizens across the nation engaged in collective silence, effectively creating a nationwide tax evasion event.

As the stalemate progressed, tensions mounted, and the prospect of a constitutional showdown turned into a deafening call to arms. Diplomats and economists scrambled to broker a peace deal, fearing that this fiscal faux pas could spiral into a full-blown global conflict, with nations rallying around the banners of either absolute silence or deafening discourse.

In a last-ditch effort to avert disaster, an emergency session of the United Nations General Assembly was convened. Delegates from around the world, wearing earplugs and ear muffs respectively, debated the merits and pitfalls of a universal tax policy based on sound levels. The assembled nations narrowly avoided an all-out acoustic alliance, opting instead for a resolution that called for a return to "rational and respectful" economic dialogue.

As the dust settles and the world steadies itself on its axis, one thing is clear: the path to peace and prosperity is a perilous journey, particularly when it comes to taxes. Let this be a cautionary tale of what happens when political gamesmanship and economic ignorance collide, potentially setting the stage for the next major global conflict. Only time will tell if this close call will lead to a new era of fiscal responsibility or if we are destined to repeat this deafening debacle.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.