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In a stunning display of political chutzpah, the Democratic Party has unveiled an ambitious economic plan that promises to usher in a new era of prosperity for all Americans, provided they're willing to part with their hard-earned cash in exchange for a slice of a pie that's still in the oven.

The plan, dubbed "FuturEcon 2025," was introduced by the charismatic and visionary Senator Progessive, who has been described by peers as "the kind of guy who thinks a QR code is a new brand of whiskey." The proposal calls for the implementation of a groundbreaking tax system that's as complex as a teenager's emotions and as predictable as a politician's promise.

At the heart of the plan is the introduction of "Temporal Taxation," a system that taxes citizens based on their income not just from the present but from all possible futures. "It's a revolutionary approach," explained Senator Progessive, waving his hands wildly as if summoning a genie from a magic lamp. "If you earn a dollar today, you pay taxes on that dollar. But if you're likely to earn a trillion dollars in a parallel universe where you invented a teleportation device, well, we're claiming our cut on that too."

The reaction from the public has been predictably polarized. While some economists hail the plan as a bold step towards a more equitable distribution of wealth, others fear it could lead to a dystopian nightmare where the IRS agents are literally everywhere, including in your dreams, auditing your subconscious for potential earnings.

In a related event, the Republican Party has responded with a typical display of fiscal responsibility and common sense, introducing a counter-proposal that simply rounds all tax figures to infinity and beyond, ensuring that no one, not even the most astute mathematician, can figure out how much they owe.

Meanwhile, the Treasury Department has announced the minting of a new currency, the "FuturDollar," which will be backed not by gold or silver, but by the collective dreams of American citizens. The value of the FuturDollar is expected to fluctuate wildly, much like the emotions of a teenager who just discovered emo music.

As the debate over FuturEcon 2025 continues to unfold, one thing is clear: the future of taxation in America is as murky as a swamp at dawn, and the only certainty is that the government will find a way to tax it.

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This article was automagically written, and intended only for entertainment purposes.